Sunday, April 13, 2014

I have a child with Autism...

I guess that is really a trick question. Even though there are 7 pictures it is only 4 children and ALL 4 are affected by ASD. 

#1- Is Gifted
#2- Neurotypical
#3- HFA, OCD, Anxiety
#4- Moderate Autistic (non-verbal until age 3)

Autism is so much more than what is portrayed on TV and the media. The spectrum is vast and all encompassing. 
As a parent of Autistic children there are days that I would like to shake the crap out of people for saying hurtful, judgmental things. Or for staring at me with looks that would make Cujo cry. I know what they are thinking, I know what they are saying under their breath, and I know what they post on fb hiding behind their computer screens. 
It hurts. I want cry. I want to whip my purse across their faces.
If I do not become an ASD advocate who will? Who will stand up for them when they cannot
stand up for themselves? Who will teach the neurotypical kids that ASD is not weird or creepy?

Yesterday, a friend of mine posted to fb that he had been to a big box store where he observed a parent ignoring his child while the child was having a meltdown. My friend was less than impressed with the bad parenting he observed. 
I GET IT! It is uncomfortable to be out in public and see a child screaming and acting like a brat! NO ONE wants to hear a child scream, including the parent. SO, I took that moment and commented letting him know that it is quite possible the child is Autistic and to think before judging. 

The 'floored me' comment was not my friend's but some he knows. Here is my question...
How does he/she know that most of these episodes are from bad parenting? 
It would seem from the comment that he/she has had their child meltdown in a store before, where is the compassion for other parents?
Does he/she actually think that ANY ASD behavior is preventable or predictable?
AND does he/she really think that because I know it is possible (high likely) for my child to have a meltdown while in public that I should forever keep them home so I am not disrespectful to the general public?

I mean really! What parent is proud when their child (ASD or Neurotypical) has a meltdown while in public? How many of them think "HEY, I am going to disrespect my community today and let my child tantrum while I sit and do nothing. 
I would love to say ALL but that would not be true, I am sure, but I guarantee it is the vast majority! I guess I am just surprised at how quickly we judge other parents. 
We HAVE to educate and raise awareness for ASD but more importantly
Do you agree?
Weigh in at


  1. Since becoming a parent I am constantly astounded by the judgment of other parents! Where is the compassion and understanding? How can they so easily forget the difficulty in raising another human being? Those who live in glass houses should not cast the first stone, right? Every child is different. Every child has a different set of needs. How a parent approaches those needs also tends to depend on the child. Additionally, I can guarantee that almost every parents who is enduring a tantrum in public is far more affected than the public itself.

  2. Please define the word acceptance. I find when most people or organizations use the word acceptance they really mean we won't openly reject you. Somehow they equate acceptance to mean 'not rejection'. However, in the real world it reveals itself as ignoring. I find the whole cliche to be a farce.